The 6 People You Need in a Crisis


There are points in your life when you need a little help from your friends. Maybe it’s a life-changing  decision you’re trying to make. Maybe it’s picking up the pieces after you’ve lost someone. Maybe it’s just deciding how to celebrate your birthday.

Whatever the situation, I reckon you need a solid team of support and advice from your tribe. And some people play different roles in our lives, at different times.

Here are some of the go-to life coaches who have made a difference to me.

The Sage – Like a Zen Master, the Sage rarely answers your questions directly. He doesn’t really do drama. He considers the issue calmly, then turns all your questions back on you. The sage makes you find your own answer, so you feel like, somehow, you knew what to do all along. The sage will not buy into your drama, but he will help you through it.

The Champion – Sometimes you are so deep into a situation, you lose perspective. You forget to be angry or indignant. You forget that the way you are being treated isn’t actually ok, just because it’s become normal. So the Champion gets angry on your behalf,  gives you a pep talk about what you should expect from others, and then offers to punch somebody out. Ok, that last one isn’t crucial. But nice to have.

The Bartender – There is much wisdom and enlightenment to be found at the bottom of a martini glass. So you need at least one friend who is up for a drink at any given moment, who is happy to bust out a Britney routine in a nightclub, and who is happy to eat kebabs with you in the wee hours (because there are no calories between midnight and 6am).

The Shrink – we all need a friend who doesn’t just let you talk about yourself for hours – he actually encourages it. This friend delves fearlessly into the depths of your unconscious and turns you inside out. No conversation is too self-reflective, no topic too emotional. The shrink will get you to grab a wine, lie on the lounge and talk forever.

The Contrarian – When everyone else is agreeing furiously with you and validating your existing views, the contrarian comes in with a truth-bomb that turns it all upside down. Like last week, when I was agonising over career decisions,  my contrarian gave me the kick up the bum I needed. (‘Suck it up’ was the main message, if you’re wondering).

Your Mum – let’s be honest, who else makes you cups of tea, hugs you when you cry and is always, always in your corner.

photo credit: 3 Statues via photopin (license)

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